Comments on: Second Life Divorce Raises Questions about Relationships and Boundaries

By: MomTFH

MomTFH — Sat, 13 Dec 2008 18:07:51 +0000

I would absolutely discuss these issues if you or your partner is involved in gaming or any interactive web activity. Most infidelity starts with an emotional, intense lust communication period first. You and your partner are should be open about whether these sort of relationships are allowed.

And it is up to the partner to express honestly when lines have been crossed or some outside relationship makes them uncomfortable. My husband plays an online game and was chatting every night for hours with a female player. Even though it was mostly about the game, I told him I didn’t care if she lived in Michigan and we live in Florida, it was excessive and I wasn’t comfortable with it. He stopped.

Every couple (or more…) gets to make the rules. As long as everyone is honest, then it’s fidelity. I used to be very comfortable with my ex husband having close relationships with women of the opposite sex. He slept with two of my closest friends. I may be a little gunshy now myself, but these are issues that everyone brings baggage to, so everyone gets to establish the boundaries that they feel comfortable with.

By: VioletSauce

VioletSauce — Thu, 20 Nov 2008 17:57:00 +0000

In this age where everyone seems to be networking/hooking up online, I’ve found myself being less trusting. A few years ago when my SO was visiting, he brought his laptop with him, to work (he had a work at home type of job at that time) and keep in touch with people. He would not let me see his chatting or even the people on his friends list. Why? Did he think I would copy them all down and stalk them? Well, his behavior made me want to do JUST THAT, but I didn’t.
I have no problem with him knowing who is on my list and who they are exactly. Or even him chatting with ANY of my friends who would want to chat with him, so WTF?
I can kind of sympathize with chick, but maybe this’ll teach her not to hook up in a game. Probably not, though.

By: SJ

SJ — Thu, 20 Nov 2008 04:52:05 +0000

Tis true!

By: Lorelei

Lorelei — Wed, 19 Nov 2008 17:19:41 +0000

I have no interest in dating/mating online, but I can’t deny that I have made some long-term real friendships that way. 99% of those friendships happen to be with other women, because even the 1% that are male seem determined to escalate a “hi, how are you?” text-chat relationship into a “what are you wearing, phwoar” kind of relationship, and I am not down with it.

As for whether it is cheating, I think there’s no question; he even defines his own behavior as cheating.

Also, remember that everyone online looks like they do in Real Life.

Except us. Of course. We are svelte and fabulous and do not eat all the HoHos in one sitting, ever.

By: snapdragon

snapdragon — Wed, 19 Nov 2008 02:21:17 +0000

I find myself wondering why, since they both seem to be happier with online relationships, they got married? Maybe the answer is not to feel like online relationships aren’t real enough. Clearly they are real enough to constitute cheating.